


Vanilla Kisses

by orphan_account



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), mcyt
Genre: Childhood Memories, Drunk Driving, Ex-Girlfriend, F/M, I wrote this in one sitting sorry, I'm Bad At Tagging, Sad, Sapnap-centric (Video Blogging RPF), its bad, why sap was so awkward on loh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:13:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26724970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: when nick was 14, he had a girlfriend. Two years later, she died in a car accident. just some sad shit.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 42





	Vanilla Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> content warning: mentions of death, drunk driving, and sex.  
> also I called him nick because my laptop autocorrects sapnap to subpoena every damn time I try to write it and it got really annoying.

When Nick was 14, he had his first kiss with a girl after a first date that left him desperate for more. A week later and she was officially his girlfriend, and Nick couldn’t have been happier. He made a point to write her little notes and slip them into her backpack at school. 

When Nick was 14, he told her he loved her and she said she loved him. He wanted her to look at him the way she had that night forever, like he was the only guy left in the world. 

When Nick was 15, they lost their v-cards to each other. It was soft, and awkward, and sweet. 

When Nick was 16, he went on her family vacation to Mexico, and as he ran into the ocean with her over his shoulder, he realized suddenly that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. 

When Nick was 16, she was hit by a drunk driver. Everywhere he went he was given looks of pity. Everyone had seen how in love they had been. He had never felt so alone. 

When Nick was 18, a girl kissed him at a college party. Her chapstick tasted like vanilla. He pushed her away before she could taste his tears. 

When Nick was 19, he was streaming minecraft and got a donation asking about his first kiss. He hesitated, wondering if he could tell the story without getting upset. He remembered the way her lips were sticky and tasted like vanilla ice cream, he remembered the way her hand cupped his cheek. He remembered the way he went home and couldn’t fall asleep for hours, his heart still racing from the events of the night. Judging by the lump forming in his throat, Nick decided it wouldn’t be a good idea to tell the story. “Um, what if I told you…” he trailed off, thinking of what to say. “What if I told you there was no story.” The lie hurt, because Nick knew there definitely was a story, but there was no going back now. 

When Nick was 19, he was on an online dating show. They asked him if he had kissed anyone, and he tried to change the subject. But they asked again, and he chose not to lie this time. “Yeah,” is all he says. He doesn’t want to say any more. He had gone onto the show thinking that he would be fine with choosing a girl with love, that 3 years was enough time to move on, but he was soon realizing he couldn’t willingly choose to replace her. One of them looked just like her best friend had. He still remembered the way her face looked when she had stood with him, sobbing, at the funeral. She was one of the first ones voted out. He didn’t talk very much, and he chose girls he thought would host him. He regretted going on in the first place. 

When Nick was 19, he got a dono asking about a certain name. His gameplay paused entirely, and there was an undeniable tremor in his voice when he asked “Where did you find that name?” His viewers couldn’t tell if it was from sadness or anger. He banned the name in chat, but they still talked about it. He ended the stream less than five minutes later. He tweeted “please don’t do that again” from his second account and deleted the vod. 

When Nick was 19, he made a tweet for Impaired Driving awareness month. “Not many people know this about me, but my girlfriend of two years died in a crash caused by a drunk driver 3 years, 2 months, and 21 days ago. I was only 16, but I was already so sure I was going to marry her, that she was the love of my life. Who knows if we would have lasted, but I think we would have. I'll never get to know. I hate using statistics, because she was so much more than a number, but there were probably around 29 other people that died the same day as her to a drunk driver, which is a horrible reality. To anyone out there that drives while anything but completely sober, take a step back. Think of how incredibly selfish you are being. Not only could you kill someone, or yourself, you also cause so much pain for those who lose a loved one. December is Impaired Driving Awareness month, so think before you get in the car. Stop yourself, stop your friends, stop the random guy you see at the bar. It's never worth it.” (in 4 parts) He replies to the tweets an hour later with “Yes, the name from last month was her name. Please don’t bring it up, please don’t use it when you write fanfiction, please don’t try and find pictures.” 

When Nick was 20, he posted a picture of them together. They’re laughing, at a beach, and he's got his arms around her. They both look so young. “Happy birthday love,” he captioned it.

**Author's Note:**

> This is entirely a work of fiction, but the message isn't. Those statistics are real, and as someone who was affected by a drunk driver let me tell you: its heart-wrenchingly miserable. Call a ride, don't be stupid.


End file.
